Principle # 18

I've got to say "no"

to the good so

I can say "yes"

to the best.

I love to eat in cafeterias, and I especially like ones that are arranged so that I can view what's being offered before I get to the serving line. Several years ago the Redhead (my wife) and I went into a new cafeteria, and I had the opportunity to carefully evaluate what was being offered. This enabled me to quickly move down the line, telling the people behind the counter to give me some of this and this and this. That's very important, because regardless of how hungry you are, you cannot eat some of everything on the line.

I wanted to choose foods that I felt would not only taste good but would also be good for me. In short, I had to pass up a lot of good food to get the best.

That's the parallel between the cafeteria line of life and the cafeteria line for good. In life, we simply cannot be, do, and have everything in this big, beautiful world of ours. We need to choose, and the choices we make will ultimately determine how successful we are in the eight crucial areas of life: Happiness, health, peace, prosperity, security, friendship, family, and hope. It's up to you to choose the best and pass up the good.

For physical training is of

some value, but godliness

has value for all things,

holding promise for both

the present life and the life

to come.

1 Timothy 4:8

Principle # 17

For a child,

love is spelled

T-I-M-E.

A young man was to be sentenced to penitentiary. The judge had known him from childhood and was well acquainted with his father, a famous legal scholar. "Do you remember your father?" asked the magistrate. "I remember him well, your honor."

Then, trying to probe he offender's conscience, the judge said, "As you are about to be sentenced and as you think of your wonderful dad, what do you remember most clearly about him?"

"I remember when I went to him for advice, he looked at me from the book he was writing and said, 'Run along boy; I'm busy!' When I went to him for companionship, he turned me away, saying, 'Run along, son; this book must be finished!' Your honor, you remember him as a great lawyer. I remember him as a lost friend." The magistrate muttered to himself, "Alas! Finished the book, but lost the boy!"

The workaholic approach to life seems to be growing in popularity. Strange as it may sound, the workaholic is lazy. It requires considerably more effort and risk to learn how to communicate effectively with you spouse. And it requires considerably more energy for the workaholic to learn to play with, deal with, and communicate with a child in his emotional level.

Think constantly about

these commandments ...

teach them to your

children and talk about

them when you are at

home or out for a walk; at

bedtime and the first thing

in the morning.

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 TLB

Principle # 16

The parent who

truly has a good

self-image understands

that real love demands

they do what is best

for the child.

This morning I heard a fascinating conversation between a father and a talk-show host. The father said his two little boys had been put on probation, because they had been late to school nine times in last sixty days.

A family council was called and they all (including Dad) accepted full responsibility for their parts in the scenario. The parents explained that each morning at exactly 7:30 they would leave the house for school. If the kids were not ready they would gather everything they were going to wear and head for the car. When they arrived at the school they would exit the car and walk into the school, whether they had their shoes on or not.

The parents accept their responsibility for getting the kids up early enough to give them time to get dressed and have breakfast.

Getting to school on time teaches the entire family to accept responsibility, but especially those two little guys. If they had been allowed to "get by" with being late and showing irresponsible behavior, a negative pattern might have been established. The teacher who reported them, the parent who accepted the responsibility, and the two boys are all going to be winners. That's a winning approach to life.

being punished isn't

enjoyable while it is

happening--it hurts!

But afterwards we can see

the result, a quiet growth

in grace and character.

Hebrews 12:11 TLB

Principle # 15

You will make a

lousy anybody else,

but you are the best

"you" in existence.

You are the only one

who can use your

ability. It is an

awesome responsibility.

Around the turn of the century near the town of Beaumont, Texas, a landowner was forced to sell portions of his land to feed his family. Then an oil company told him there could be oil on his property and offered to pay him royalties if he would permit them to drill. The landowner agreed, because he had nothing to lose.

When the well came in, it destroyed the wooden derrick, creating enormous excitement. Before they could cap the well, several hundred thousand barrels of oil had pumped out. That was the discovery of "Spindletop,"the most productive single oil well in history.

The landowner became an instant multimillionaire--or did he? The answer is really "no." You see, he'd been multimillionaire ever since he had owned the property. Unfortunately, he had no knowledge of that fact and consequently did not capitalized on it.

It is my personal conviction that inside all of us, there is incredible ability and talent, much of which is never recognized and used. My suggestion is simple: Get acquainted with yourself. Recognized, developed, and use what you've got. Who knows--maybe there is a "Spindletop" underneath. You've certainly got nothing to lose by doing a little drilling and exploring. Who knows what might come to the surface.

I praise you because I am

fearfully and wonderfully

made; your works are

wonderful, I know that

full well.

Psalm 1 39:14

Principle # 14

It is not what

happens to you that

determines how

far you go in life;

it is what you

do with what

happens to you.

One of the most remarkable men I've ever known is Charlie Wedemeyer. Charlie coached the Los Gatos high-school football team to the only state championship they've ever won. I remember the day I attended a practice session with Charlie and his team. He and I were carrying on an extended conversation from the sidelines when periodically an assistant coach would run up and ask questions. Without hesitation, Charlie, who had been watching intently during our entire conversation, would spell out the specifics he should follow.

The amazing thing is that the only parts of his body he can move are his eyes and mouth. Charlie Wedemeyer suffers from Lou Gehrig's disease. His wife, Lucy, is his interpreter. She reads his lips and effectively delivers the message.

Charlie has the most remarkable attitude and the greatest sense of humor I believe I have ever seen. Though travel arrangements are difficult, he regularly speaks to people in schools, business, prisons, and churches. He has something to say, and Lucy verbalized it to the audience. He might be the only speaker in America who can't speak. Needless to say, his life and wife communicate a powerful message of hope, love, and a "never-give-up" spirit. They both have a passion to make a difference.

but despite all this,

overwhelming victory is

ours through Christ who

loved us enough to die

for us.

Romans 8:37 TLB

Principle # 13

The ladder of

success works like

any other ladder.

Very few have climbed

it with their hands

in their pockets.

The finals of the U.S. Amateur Golf Championship of 1997 was one of the most exciting and dramatic golf events of the year. Playing in the finals were Steve Scott and Tiger Woods. On the eighteenth green, the final hole, Steve was one up, putting first. Tiger's ball was in Steve's putting line, so Tiger spotted his ball a club-head length away and marked it. Steve Scott putted and missed.

Tiger carefully circled the green, viewed every possible angle and was lined up to putt when Steve reminded him that he had not spotted his ball back in the original spot. Making the correction, Tiger sank the putt, and the match was thrown into "sudden death," which was won by Tiger Wodds.

Here's the reason Steve Scott is such a marvelous role model. Had he not reminded Tiger that he had not respotted his ball correctly, and Tiger had stroked the putt, he would have been penalized two stroked the putt, he would have been penalized two strokes and lost the championship.

That's what makes long-term winners. That was sportsmanship and integrity personified. Even though Steve lost the championship, he won something infinitely more important--self-respect and the admiration of literally millions of golfers all over the world. That's a role model in action.

Hard work means

prosperity; only a fool

idles away his time.

proverbs 12:11 TLB

Principle # 12

If a child lives

with praise

he learns

to appreciate.

-Dorothy Nolte

Children Live What They Learn

If a child lives in criticism,He learns to condemn.

If a child lives in hostility, He learns violence.

If a child lives with ridicule, He learns to be shy.

If a child lives with shame, He learns to feel guilty.

If a child lives in encouragement, He learns confidence.

If a child lives with praise, He learns to appreciate.

If a child lives in fairness, He learns justice.

If a child lives with security , He learns faith.

If a child lives with approval, He learns to like himself.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, He learns to love the world.

-Dorothy Law Nolte

Lo, children are an

heritage of the Lord: and

the fruit of the womb is

his reward.

Psalm I27:3 KJV

Principle # 11

Inject people

with hope.

On Saturday, May 3, 1997, I had the privilege of attending a Special Olympics event with my family. Our granddaughter, Anne, participated on two races and won a silver and a gold medal. She was exited.

The opening ceremonies, complete with color guard, speeches master of ceremonies, salute to the flag, "Star Spangled Banner," and performance by a drill team were all spectacular to watch. However, the most moving sight was watching the opening parade. Many emotions were displayed, but the main one was the sheer delight of so many of the athletes-their smiles, the jumping up and down, the way they hugged each other, and the enthusiasm they displayed.

The master of ceremonies reminded us that just thirty years ago the "experts" believed that no mentally retarded person would ever be able to swim the length of an Olympic-size swimming pool or run a mile. But then he rightly observed that they did not measure the heart or the soul of these athletes.

Question: "What would happen if all of us used the same percentage of our ability that these special athletes use of theirs?" Seeing the athletes' commitment gave hope to those present that day. Remember, those who give hope to others are generally filled hope themselves.

I pray that God will help

you overflow with hope in

him through the Holy

Spirit power within you.

Romans 15:13